11 Signs of Low Value and 3 Things to Do About It!
Have you ever wondered how you know if you have a low sense of value? Here are 11 key signs that your sense of low value is impacting your life.
- Self-Criticism– People who are experiencing low value tend to be overly self-critical. If the purpose of life is to learn and grow, we would want to understand the effectiveness of our past choices as quickly and effortlessly as possible to apply that learning to the next situation. With people who are experiencing self-criticism, the self-criticism actually slows or eliminates the learning feedback lope because the focus is on criticism and not on learning. Criticism is a form of self-punishment; where the person believes that if they punish themselves it will cause a change in behavior. It doesn’t work.
- Life Dissatisfaction– People with low value have a high tendency to be dissatisfied with the way life situations turn out. They often feel like a victim to events and other people’s choices. They rarely take responsibility for what they have done or the part they played in creating the situation.
- Hypersensitivity to Criticism -When individuals are self-critical, accepting the criticism of others is unbearable. Their self-talk is so damaging that if anyone responds in a way that is even slightly critical, they feel that it is a personal attack.
- Indecisive– People with low value have the hardest time making a decision. They feel like they are already coming from behind and if they make a wrong decision, it will be so painful that they would rather not make any decision at all. They often want others to make the decision for them so that they don’t have to be responsible. When others do step in to decide, the person with low value then feels like a victim and the cycle continues.
- Excessive Desire to Please– People with low value crave the approval of others. They work to receive the approval of others in a way that they have never given to themselves. They are easily manipulated which then continues the cycle of victimization.
- Perfectionism– People with low value have to do it perfectly because they feel so imperfect. They we spend an inordinate amount of time on tasks to get them just right. They believe that if they can get it just right, it will compensate for how inadequate they feel. It is for this reason that they have a hard time delegating task to others without micromanaging them. They have a high need to be in control.
- Neurotic Guilt– First, what is guilt? Guilt is feeling bad about something you have done or didn’t do, usually because it has harmed or impacted another’s life. Neurotic guilt is when you magnify feeling bad beyond what is reasonable that the feeling doesn’t match the offense. People with low value will over apologize, they will be devastated by their mistake and they will feel worse than the situation would ever call for. They do this because they want the approval of others and they feel overwhelmed by the idea that their behavior has negatively impacted someone else’s life.
- Floating Hostility– It doesn’t sound good but what is it? It is an emotion where an individual is always on the verge of exploding, even for unimportant things. Anger is, 100% of the time, created by feeling like a victim. People with low value are constantly walking around feeling like a victim and exploding with anger any time something reminds them of their victim-hood.
- Negative Outlook on the Future– People with low value have a generally negative view of the future. They not only believe the glass is half empty, but also they believe that someone is draining it just to victimize them more. They do not believe they have the ability to, or that someone will prevent them from, overcoming the obstacles of life. They have a high tendency to believe that life is not fair.
- Envy– Bertrand Russell said that envy was one of the most potent causes of unhappiness. People with low value spend a great deal of time envying others and feeling ill equipped to be, do, have what they desire.
- Argumentative– People with low value have to be right. They will do whatever it takes to be right. They will argue, raise their voice, yell, scream or get angry to win an argument.
How many of these conditions are you experiencing in your life?
Here are three things you can do today to begin to increase your internal value:
- Self-Love– Take a few minutes every day loving you. Close your eyes and imagine pure love flowing down from the top of your head into your body, mind and heart. When you feel full, open your heart and send love into your relationships, your home, your work, and every area of your life. See your mind, heart and body being transformed by pure love. See every cell of your body being immersed in pure love, every thought being transformed by pure love and every feeling washed by pure love. The more we love ourselves and others, the more valuable we feel.
- Change Your Self Talk– Self talk is the internal conversation we have going on within our head all the time. We can change it from being negative and destructive to being positive by noticing it and redirecting. The dominate idea that I invite people to consider is, “I am a person of great value. I am an expression of God.” Every time you notice self-talk that is based on destructive thinking, change it to your new dominate thought, “I am a person of great value. I am an expression of God.” The important thing about thinking is that you can’t have two thoughts at the same time. Every time you redirect your thinking, it builds a new positive value within yourself.
- Bring in a Coach– Any time we want to change something in our life; it is helpful to have trained coach guiding us. They can see things we can’t see. They can see behaviors we are totally unaware of and the impact those behaviors are having on our life. They can bring new tools that will accelerate the transformation process.
I am here to help. I have coached with hundreds of people on transforming their internal value. With my help you will transform the challenges of the past into a life you love. I am committed to you being the person you are meant to be.
Call me today and we can design a coaching package that will give you the breakthrough you are looking for and assist you in creating the life you desire. You deserve a life of great value.